Psychology of the Quiet Coach

Off the T-girl topic for a change and doing the grumpy old woman bit... prompted by Janes recent posting about train seat chivalry, it reminded me of some of those situations I so often see on trains; or to be precise, from the comfort of my reserved seat in the quiet coach - well... nearly my seat.

Quite often, by the time the intercity service reaches our humble town, most of the quiet coach seats are occupied, - but not quite enough to oust the lout, or usurp the business man from yours.... but you can tell these folk are quite practised at giving out the hidden psychological messages of 'bog off and don't hassle me' when they occupy your reserved seat.

Like for example, there's 'sleeping guy', who occupies the unreserved seat next to yours but thinks his brief case has it's own busy life to lead and cares for it by giving it your seat. This is especially annoying when your seat is the only reserved seat in the coach, and apart from 'sleeping guy' the coach is empty.

Then there's 'railway worker guys' who have a medical need to sit next to each other and discuss how well United faired in the previous evenings match - and yes, you guessed it, they occupy your seat.

And there's proffesional dude and dudess who travel the same route every day; they really don't care where they plant themselves 'cos they're only going to the next stop so it doesn't matter if they occupy someones seat.

Ladies don't get away without an observation from Ms Kate - in the quiet coach, they are the absolute the worst for using the phone... they're also the ones mostly likely to shout, if someone else uses a phone! On a recent journey, a girl got on for the last 20 minutes of the service and she managed to make 7 phone calls - I was impressed... normally us girls can only make one call in that time; perhaps she was 'business dude' in drag....

But if you're sat in my seat on the 16:20 out of Birmingham, you take your life into your hands.... unless you're a lovely old lady from Falmouth in which case I'll sit in the seat next to you, have a nice chat about gardening and treat you to tea and cake!

Boring

Mrs Kate has accused me of having a boring blog - so what do I care?

Alcohol-free wine what's that all about?.... now that's boring - but Mrs Kate thought it would be nice to try.... yuck! - trust me, give it a wide berth unless you like flavoured grape juice. I told her that it would taste like that before we tried it.... gee... was I right! It's labelled and looks like it's real counterpart, but .... I can't quite put my finger on whats missing?... no happy feeling... no compulsion to do some mad girlie dancing around the house... totally pointless!

Here's another one.... directions to the RNIB conference centre in Birmingham that a blind person can follow; I had to rely on looking up the address on Google maps so I could find it.

Not boring was meeting up with Kay Denise a couple of weeks ago, it was nice to see her out.

Not boring was getting out with Mrs Kate and Di at one of our favourite establishments in the Village, followed by some attempt at mad dancing at Naps. 'Boring' was the 'da management' letting in just about anyone to just moomin-troll around the dance floor - we gave up after only a few minutes.

Actually my blog IS boring... I'm just bored writing anything on it at the moment - it's good job life isn't like that!

Dear Diary

Dear Diary, why do you look so neglected? could it be I've haven't posted anything to you for over a month now....

Quite often I find myself thinking about some of the little gems of our T-life as I stare out of the commuter train window that occassionally takes me to far away exotic places like Birmingham; only to forget about them when the opportunity arises to post them on here.

Life is far from boring and the pressures of work are just the same as they were over Winter when I was quite depressed about them, but I just feel I'm coping better with those; but I've already seen some of the questions on the company stress survey due out in the next week or so - I have a feeling my matter-of-fact responses to those will only set the alarm bells ringing. But I'm resolved with a determination that I won't ever 'come out' to any of my work colleagues; sensitive as we often are to picking up on any small references to the LGBT world, there are one or two in the team that I feel will be uncomfortable .... not to mention the issues of whether the masses in the organisation would ever take me seriously again!

My closest of friends and Mrs Kate know of personal thoughts on my T-self; for everyone else it's simpler to say that I think I've found most of the pieces of the big picture that represents my life and life is pretty full, relaxed and good - although I am a little dissappointed that I hardly have the time (or perhaps the patience) to get around everyone elses blogs - sorry girls!

So what have we been upto? - I also find a little dissappointment in that we haven't been getting out as much this year, although a trip out on a recent Saturday evening made me chuckle a bit when we were kind of refused entry to a 'girls only' event that was taking place at Eden - translate this to being actually a Lesbian-only event and they were charging the 'non-girls' £3.50 entry - including Mrs Kate. I guess it's the flip-side of the coin where non t-girls are charged entry to get into Naps; so a sort of balance is brought to the Kharma in all things.

And let us not overlook Sparkle.... yeah, another year; sure, I enjoyed it but don't missunderstand me by the fact I'm not writing or raving about it much here; Mrs Kates 5 part blog-essay says it all - I would only contribute to the growing blog-litter that is being posted about it!

Oh okay so here's my small contribution..... seemed like there were more folks there this year but I wore my feet sore dancing in Naps on Friday night (which only confirms Di's observation that when I dance, I really go for it!). Which meant Saturday night my feet were too sore to do any dancing and I was too tired from being out late the night before - which was just as well since it was very crowded where ever we went; so we were back at the Atrium for around midnight. I found I had a flare for giving out leaflets for Teela on Saturday afternoon; and she kindly had t-shirts made for us with our pictures on with the caption 'Teelas Angels' - which was kind of nice.

But there are possibly two mental pictures from the event I doubt I will never forget :-
(1) Saturday evening - the (real) girl with a spikey collar being lead past Naps on a lead who bid us 'evening all' as she passed us by.
(2) 'Those shorts' worn by Emma. Mrs Emma said she'll forward the details of good therapist should we need it!

Some pictures appear to the right of this page, replacing last years. Other than that, take care dear diary, girls and friends alike.

Sparkling in the sun

They say it always rains in Manchester - it's not true; this last weekend was glorious, but it could have rained and it would have been just as brilliant to see Karen again, and be en-femme for 3 days straight. Sparkle is in about 6 weeks, but we had our very own for Karen as she can't make it for the official event.

Just brilliant... I can't put it into words as there are so many thoughts and memories rushing at me all at once... to say the least, I'm all trannied out (well... for a week at least)!

In a torrent of thoughts and emotions, not necessarily in order, the weekend went like this:-

Friday: Wore my nice summery posh frock, met Karen a little later than planned, really hot and nearly melting, had a superb evening with Di and Karen in Taurus, changed for Naps, danced our feet off, got about 4 hours sleep, Saturday: out shopping in city centre, very sunny, took ages queuing for the checkout in Primark, tried the XL white jeans in Amazing - didn't fit me, found a nice pair of white jeans in New Look for a tenner, Di got a superb dress which with the matching shoes she looked stunning, met Mandy so she could use our room to change in, met the girls in View and then the group meal in Villagios, a bloody awful din in Velvet (but I was a bit grumpy anyway), some dancing in Naps but I was way too tired from the night before, Sunday: bumped into Karen and Di after breakfast at Velvet, saw Karen off at the train station (sensed she was sad to leave), walked to Arndale, had ice cream in Piccadilly Gardens, still very hot and sunny, then to Transfixed, cold drink in the bar at The Place on the way back, then back to car park and home for about 4:30pm (phew!).

Oh... and one last point, as you might imagine my feet were very sore after all that; 4 days on and they're still recovering..... no blisters but I feel like I've been walking on glass - but it was all worth it (Note to self: must get pixie boots re-heeled, wonder if I can have my feet re-soled at the same time).

Sans Mascara

On Wednesday I was out without Mrs Kate as she was still suffering the influences of piggin' cold. But a business meeting I had in Birmingham ran a little longer than anticipated and I ended up missing the earlier train back home; the result of this was quite a rushed exercise in throwing ones face on before dashing out to the monthly Northern Angels get-together.

This months gathering was much smaller in number than of recent; just the 6 of us with Emma W, Emma J, Tina, Mandy, Marlene and myself (Tina's t'other half joined us later); but such a small group meant we could share girly stories which is often limited with a large group. On the way over to Villagios, I was leading the way whilst talking to our new girl Marlene; as we crossed over the bridge and turned the corner into Canal St. this guy in approaching us was clearly giving some attention to one of the girls in our group. As he passed Marlene and myself he circled around behind the group focusing his attention on Emma J, who had chosen to wear a rather short skirt - or perhaps it was just a wide belt?. Sensing his attention in Emma might be unwelcome I prepared to intervene, although I didn't quite catch what he said to Emma, his intentions appeared harmless enough and fortunately he didn't follow us into the restaurant

After Villagios we went on to the Manchester Concorde at the Rem, arriving just in time for the raffle. After a quick drink and a chat with Mary and the others it was onto ... Naps - where else!.

On the way over to Naps we were greeted in the street by a couple of girls who rather drunkenly attempted to serenade us - I've no idea what they were cat-a-walling but I'm certain the X-Factor judges would have given the 'urgh-uh' quickly enough. The cat-a-walling gave way to inquisitive calls to 'can we feel your boobs - are they real?' ... I offered as long as I could do the same, but they didn't seem as obliging.

And in Naps.... perhaps it was having drunk so much coke, perhaps it was being allowed out on my own? ... but the music was reasonable for a change and I danced right through until just turned 1am when I/we all went down the basement for a cool-down, a drink, a bit of chat and so on. It was just before 2am when I left; I figured with getting to the car-park a little later than usual that might avoid being stuffed with the full £8 car park charge - wrong!

When I got home, I followed the sad ritual of returning back to 'him', but seemed to have a bit of difficulty in trying to remove the mascara; using the usual makeup remover failed to reveal the familiar black mixed with foundation when a wiped around my eyes - how could this be? ... I checked the mirror, only to realise that in my rush to get out I'd forgotten to put on any mascara.

Fed up!

Tomorrow will be the 10th day since the first signs of this cold appeared; Mrs Kate also came down with it earlier in the week. It's not flu but it might as well be since it's confined us to our bed on at least 2 consecutive days each and any physical effort results in a need to rest for a while.

I was hoping we would be well enough to meet with Emma and Mrs Emma for her first outing to the village this evening; I was so looking forward to seeing that first reaction to a visit to Naps.... well, ... I guess we'll hear all about it in due course!

Beating the stress monster

I've not got around to putting finger to keyboard for the noteworthy events since my last posting - sadly dear reader, mid-April this year has seen the stress monster resurrect itself and it's only been over the last few days I've managed to banish it back to whence it came - well.... almost. It's silly really, there are certain triggers that only occur at this time of year which create irrational feelings of panic; I thought it had gone away but this year it snook up and caught me by surprise. Bad monster!

Events since the last posting

• Met with Heather for her first ever outing in the Village - Ok you might say, helping a new girl out of her closet... well, yes and no; Heather is actually way down her 'lifeplan' but has never actually got to go out. It was good to talk to Heather about all things 'T', her approach so far and how she's still dealing with the 'Bob' side as she hasn't quite reached the point of going fulltime. It was lovely to talk to her.


• Met with Emmas other half. We spent the day, the four of us meandering around the Trafford Centre whilst talking about our 'coming out' experiences; that is to say that both Emma and I were in 'Bob mode' and Mrs Emma was able to talk to Mrs Kate about all manner of areas that any newly introduced partner to the T-world might want to ask about. Mrs Emma seems very supportive but clearly was still dealing with the overwhelming amount of information being presented to her on all sides. For Mrs Kate and I, it was really the first time we've met a partner who's just finding their way; and accordingly we've learned a few things about ourselves, such as curbing the amount of enthusiasm we might show when we spot a nice sparkly top in Dorothy Perkins!


• Teelas Tea - which rather bizarrely (for me anyway!) some of us got to see some of the regulars as Bob as turned back to caterpillar at the end; Tina for me was the biggest surprise in that theres no way I would have recognised her as 'Bob' and is quite stereotypical in her/his daily role (no insult intended!).... but as Tina, what more validation could you have by being challenged to pay the entrance fee at Naps?! (only real girls have to pay to get into Naps).


• We got out to the Village on a few occasions; most notably the Northern Angels meal where Heather had her second outing, Emma (another Emma!) had her first visit since she returned from Spain. Interestingly this particular Emma has also had some 'coming out' revelations of her own with her family (good luck Emma).


• Last night we met up at one of Bevs Saturday get-togethers and most notable was Dianas return into circulation following her recent timeout for some 'adjustments'. Later we went .... Naps (where else!... but not before a visit to Velvet), we met up with Jane who is also looking the part now she's passed the threshold and living the dream. But today, I find that ever so slight sniffle has broken out into a full-on cold - sorry girls if you end up catching that off me (and NO! Mrs Kate! its not Swine Flu!).

Take care girls xxx